Stephen Fry has opened this year's Baftas with a typically arch monologue that nonetheless played safer than last year's effort, with its sex and Scientology references.

Fry said 12 Years a Slave was so good he hoped it would be "24 Years a Slave", and compared the plot of Woody Allen's Blue Jasmine to the recent travails of French president François Hollande. The comedian remarked of American Hustle actor Christian Bale that he'd chosen "a different 70s wig" for the evening, while also expressing delight that Helen Mirren "has brought her grandson along" – before welcoming Prince William.

As a warning to any potential Gwyneth Paltrows among the winners, Fry reminded the audience said when you make a cup of tea, "you don't thank the kettle, the cup, the milk the cow, the tea picker". Finally, he introduced the night's first presenter, Oprah Winfrey, with the words: "Her performance in the Butler was so moving I almost gave mine the afternoon off".

• The Baftas ceremony is on BBC1 from 9pm. You can watch along with Xan Brooks's live blog, which begins at 8pm