Name: Luc Anus.

Age: 26.

Appearance: Surprisingly presentable.

Why is he in the news? He is standing for election in Belgium.

What’s so interesting about him? Oh, come on.

No, seriously, what’s the big deal? Well, he’s a socialist standing as a council candidate in the district of Lobbes, just west of Charleroi. His surname is Anus, which is a problematic name for a politician.

It’s a bum deal. Leave the feeble witticisms to me, please. Facebook has taken exception to Mr Anus’s family name and banned it on the grounds that it is “offensive and inappropriate”.

No ifs, no butts? I’m never working with you again. The poor man has had to campaign under the name “Luc Anu”. “Facebook just does not accept my name,” he said.

I hope he doesn’t come bottom of the poll. The Facebook ban could work to his advantage. It is winning him publicity and his election poster is now a hit on social media. And the Belgian socialists have been here before: in 2012, they fielded Jean-Claude Prick as a candidate.

How does Mr Anu(s) feel about it? “I can deal with it,” he said, “but I can understand that people who are weaker have a hard time with bullying.” He is one of the 49 Anuses registered in Belgium.

A rude name didn’t do Ed Balls any harm. True, and there are plenty of other politicians who have had unfortunate monikers.

I fear you are going to launch into a schoolboy recitation of politicians with rude names. You have probably already recalled Anthony Weiner, the New York Democratic congressman forced to resign when he sent pictures of his wein ...

That’s quite enough. Then, of course, there is Bill Boner, the former mayor of Nashville.

Please stop. And the highly respected Dutch senator Tiny Kox.

I’m beginning to agree with Facebook on this … The Lib Dem peer Lady Garden, the former Democratic representative for Washington Norm Dicks, the Idaho republican senator Mike Crapo.

Have you quite finished? I think so.

Good. Because you’ve made a complete arse of yourself. I have also looked up other Luc Anuses. The Roman poet Marcus Annaeus Lucanus (39-65 AD), better known as Lucan, although, as far as we know, the name change was not forced on him by the Roman equivalent of Facebook.

That’s more like it. Then there’s the Lucanus genus of stag beetles, which includes Lucanus cervus, the best-known species of stag beetle in western Europe.

Do say: “Vote for Anus.”

Don’t say: “Do you think Anus and Kox could forge a populist alliance in the Low Countries?”