Van Badham 

In the spirit of both Zen and Christmas holidays, I’ve decided to become a digital dropout

This year I am adapting my own rituals – and with them, hopefully, the landscape of my brain - as the ultimate gift to myself
  
  

reading paper book on the beach from personal perspective
‘I’m deleting the digital doom chat and seeking out some arcane sensory experiences in a bold gamble for some mindfulness.’ Photograph: Irina Dobrolyubova/Getty Images

It’s the last fortnight of December, time to reappraise the traditions of shared holiday rituals.

Will Australians once more create kitchen-bound El Niño microclimates in their sweltering devotion to a Christmas turkey, or go with the smelly, if pleasurable, coolness of a prawns-on-ice buffet? Do we pretend to love a handmade noodle necklace more than receipt of an electronic lump of plastic we’ve been coveting all year? Should we indulge anti-vax, flat-earther Uncle Awful spouting theses of YouTubology at the dining table or scream “not this year, Satan” and instead book a package to Bali?

After a tough year, the need for a Christmas miracle seems dire. One thing I’m clinging to with “there is a Santa Claus!” hope is news that the popularity of the hard right’s annual insistence of a “war on Christmas” – which I wrote about last year – is finally waning.

YouGov polls have now revealed Christmas may be a political battleground for families, but it’s no longer a “forever war”, even for those on an information diet of Russian propaganda or Fox News. Only 23% of Americans remain convinced that saying “happy holidays” is the hypersonic missile of a Great Replacement plot to sub out God-fearing, culturally fundamentalist Christians with people more tolerant and respectful and certainly far more fun at a party, down from 39% only two years ago. And while 31% remain “undecided”, I’ll take what I can get. It’s been a helluva year.

Why the change? Deliberate optimism suggests that – please, baby Jesus – concrete reality just may triumph over evidence-free nonsense in the end. Christmas is going nowhere. Christmas trees, reindeer cakes, Santa hats and Christmas sales are everywhere across our cities right now, suggesting that if there ever was a war on Christmas, Christmas won.

I’m some ideological distance from the far right, yet since a health scare, my last column and a psychologically circuit-breaking two-week vacation, this year I am adapting my own holiday rituals – and with them, hopefully, the landscape of my brain – as the ultimate gift to myself.

It’s a present I’m eager to share, even with my nemeses.

This Christmas, I’m going analogue. I torched my X account over a month ago – released from its dopamine hamster-wheel, it’s felt like being on holiday, even before I’ve started sucking down the mince pies.

Turns out, the space that opens when intrusions by outrage-merchants, narcissists and the relentless horrors of the world are silenced is one where consideration, introspection and, yes, serenity may grow. Zen philosophy believes engagement with the sensory world of mechanical action, the performance of tasks and awareness of one’s environment is an opportunity for the enlightenment of rhythm, flow and interconnectedness.

So in the spirit of both Zen and Christmas holidays, I’m deleting the digital doom chat and seeking out some arcane sensory experiences in a bold gamble for some mindfulness. These are the wild things I’m going to try:

Reading books: wads of paper with words printed on pages you have to turn, books oblige you to imagine what the stories they tell look and feel and sound and even smell like, in your own head – so it feels like you’re in the story. Apparently, the immersion gets more intense the longer you stick with it!

Consuming legacy media: There really are professional news organisations where qualified people work out for you what’s happening in your community so you can properly think about it – they even factcheck it for you. Some print on paper – I admit, that may be going a bit far.

Being with people: You can find out what’s going on with people if you talk to them in person. Truly, you can even develop real-time insights about them if you visit places together: bars, restaurants, shops, parks, beaches, parties, venues, even beds. And you don’t have to photograph it – if the experience is meaningful, you’ll remember it!

Going to the movies and live performances: these are incredible group sensory-deprivation entertainment experiences, where the venue is altered so ALL you can concentrate on is the show. And then you talk about it after you’ve thought about it!

Walking around, gardening, sport, art and craft, cleaning: Birds are real! Trees are real! Hell, even climate change is real! And your room smells! Art looks different when it’s not on a screen! The earth is round!

If human enlightenment is still possible, maybe it’s got something to do with comprehending observable phenomena and tangible proof.

To be a digital dropout is a radical lifestyle choice; dear friends, it’s been an anxious year. Reality triumphed in the imaginary war against Christmas, but 97% of Australians still struggle to discern disinformation online. If there’s one present we all deserve it’s the choice not to be one of them.

Happy holidays!

• Van Badham is a Guardian Australia columnist

 

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