Hi, Paddington. How are you finding London?

It’s quite crowded after Darkest Peru. Everyone seems in such a hurry.

How did you slip through customs unnoticed? (1)

I’m not really sure whether I’m supposed to talk about this, but I came over to England as a stowaway in a ship’s lifeboat. It took several weeks to get here and I lived on marmalade. Luckily, marmalade is a very good cure for seasickness.

Liam Gallagher is a fellow fan of the duffel coat. Are you glad you brought yours?

I didn’t have a duffel coat when I first arrived in London, but I’m very glad I have one now. I’m finding it quite cold after Peru, and the hood is very useful when it rains.

What was it like working with all those famous actors such as the Earl of Grantham and the Doctor?

They were all very nice indeed, even Mr Capaldi. He plays the part of the Browns’ neighbour, Mr Curry. I don’t think the real Mr Curry likes bears very much, but when Mr Capaldi wasn’t acting he was actually quite friendly to me.

Your film is a PG because of scenes of you hiding in a fridge, skateboarding behind a bus and surfing down the stairs in a bathtub. (2) Did you do all your own stunts?

I wasn’t supposed to, but I’m what Mr Brown describes as accident-prone. While we were filming, there were several occasions when things went wrong so they kept the cameras running and I think some of my accidents found their way into the film.

Have you seen Ted? He says things like, “Hey, play Chopsticks, you jazzy slut!” Why aren’t all bears as polite as you? (3)

I haven’t actually met many bears, as there aren’t many left where I come from, but Aunt Lucy is extremely polite and she taught me my good manners before she sent me to live in England.

• Paddington is released on 28 November

Footnotes (1) Any animal entering the UK from outside the EU requires a microchip, a rabies vaccination and up to four months in quarantine (2) Paddington features “dangerous behaviour, mild threat, innuendo, and infrequent mild bad language”, according to the BBFC (3) Precocious bears: see Boo-Boo. Unfunny bears: see Fozzie. Resentful bears: see Bungle. Closet bears: see Rupert.