Michael Hogan 

The 10 best pirates

As Treasure Island opens at the National Theatre, Michael Hogan chooses his favourite timber-shiverers…
  
  


  1. Captain Pugwash

Before anyone says it: no, there weren’t characters called Seaman Staines or Roger the Cabin Boy. Urban myths. Although there was Master Mate, which sounds a bit rude. John Ryan’s comic strips about a pompous but lovable pirate were adapted into a 1957 BBC series using monochrome cardboard cutouts, with the Trumpet Hornpipe its evocative theme tune. The mid-70s version was in colour, and a 1998 revival used full animation. Horatio Pugwash sailed the high seas in the Black Pig, assisted by three hapless pirates and cabin boy Tom, who invariably saved the day. Their arch foe was Cut-Throat Jake, captain of the Flying Dustman.

2. Jean Lafitte

In the early 19th century the governor of Louisiana offered a $300 reward for the capture of this pirate plaguing the Gulf of Mexico. Lafitte responded by offering $1,000 for the capture of the governor. Together with brother Pierre, this French folk hero ruled an island colony of pirates who captured merchant ships at cannon-point and smuggled the stolen booty into New Orleans. Lafitte’s reputation spread across the Atlantic, and George III offered him British citizenship and landholdings if he helped the Royal Navy to attack the United States. Lafitte stayed loyal to his adopted homeland and helped General Andrew Jackson defeat the British fleet in exchange for a full pardon.

3. Captain Jack Sparrow

“Based on the Disneyland log flume ride” wasn’t the most promising pitch for a film, but the Pirates of the Caribbean supernatural swashbuckler franchise now has four instalments (Curse of the Black Pearl, Dead Man’s Chest, At World’s End and On Stranger Tides) grossing $4bn – and there’s a fifth (Dead Men Tell No Tales) in pre-production. Deeply dull Orlando Bloom and Keira Knightley were the hero and heroine, but the show was stolen by Johnny Depp’s eccentric but ethical skipper – all dreadlocks, kohl eyes and rum-addled swagger. Depp based his portrayal on a blend of Pepé Le Pew and Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards, who later popped up in a cameo as Sparrow’s father.

4. Long John Silver

The roguish buccaneer from Robert Louis Stevenson’s 1883 adventure yarn Treasure Island set the template for fictional pirates ever since: schooners, “pieces of eight”, tropical islands, treasure chests, maps marked with an “X”, and one-legged seafarers with talking parrots perched on their shoulders. Dorset actor Robert Newton played Silver in the 1950 film, complete with exaggerated West Country accent, which has become standard stereotypical pirate-speak. Arrrrr, me hearties. John Lennon was a fan, naming his band Long John & the Silver Beetles before shortening it to the Beatles.

5. Blackbeard

The hulking Bristolian, real name Edward Teach, was an infamous figure during the early 18th century’s “golden age of piracy”, commanding four sloops and a 300-strong army who sailed the Caribbean, raiding merchant ships. Despite his formidable reputation, there are no tales of Blackbeard killing anyone. He ruled through fear, showing himself wearing a huge feathered tricorn, a sword in each hand, plus multiple knives and pistols. Teach wove lit fuses into his beard for battle, so he “looked like the devil”. He was eventually beheaded in battle in 1718, but ghost stories say he roams the afterlife, searching for his head.

6. Anne Bonny

Having emigrated to the Bahamas, fiery Irish redhead Anne Bonny, née Cormac (c1700-c1782), left her husband and fell in with the local tavern ruffians – among them “Calico Jack” Rackham, captain of a pirate sloop. They became lovers and Anne joined his crew, winning over male shipmates by drinking and fighting even more than them. Rackham grew jealous when Anne befriended a young crew member, except he turned out to be Mary Read, the era’s only other convicted female pirate, disguised as a boy. The trio became a formidable team. When Rackham was captured and hung, Bonny and Read escaped the same fate when they “pleaded their bellies” (claimed they were pregnant) and were jailed instead.

7. Captain Hook

Said to be “the only man Long John Silver feared”, the villain of 1904’s Peter Pan, or The Boy Who Wouldn’t Grow Up was captain of the Jolly Roger, with long, dark curls, Smee as his sidekick and an iron hook for a hand after the appendage was lopped off by Pan and fed to a crocodile. Both absurd and sinister, Hook was the archvillain of JM Barrie’s Neverland, partial to duelling, cigar-smoking and plank-walking. He’s been played by Dustin Hoffman, Ian McShane, Rhys Ifans and Tom Hiddleston but it’s the foppish 1953 Disney cartoon incarnation that lingers in the imagination. “Blast that Peter Pan! I’ll get him for this, if it’s the last thing I do…”

8. Black Bart

Welshman Bartholomew Roberts (1682-1722) was a reluctant pirate. He was officer on a slave ship captured by pirates and decided that if he couldn’t beat them he’d join them. “A merry life and a short one shall be my motto,” he reasoned. With his navigational skills and courage, Roberts turned out to be rather good at it, plundering 470 ships off the Americas and West Africa. This civilised seadog preferred tea to rum, dressed in his finest clothes for battle and made his crew agree to a strict 11-point code of conduct. When he was shot in the throat while standing on deck, and buried at sea, it signalled the end of piracy’s golden age.


9. One-Eyed Willie

Goonies never say die! Cult 80s movie The Goonies, based on a story by executive producer Steven Spielberg, follows a band of pre-teens as they try to save their homes in the “Goon Docks” neighbourhood of Astoria, Oregon from demolition. In the process they discover an ancient Spanish map leading to the long-lost treasure hoarded by 17th-century pirate One-Eyed Willie, aka William B Pordobel. A jester banished from the Spanish court, Willie became an ingenious pirate who plundered the king’s ships in revenge. He hid his ship, the Inferno, in a secret underground lagoon and set a series of deadly booby traps in the surrounding caverns. When gang leader Mikey found Willie’s remains, he reverently hailed him as the “first Goonie”.

10. Henry Every

During the 1690s, Devon sailor Henry Every terrorised the oceans with his ship the Fancy. It made the most profitable raid in history, plundering £600,000-worth of precious metals and jewels after a bloody battle with the Indian Mughals’ fleet, and Every became the first ever subject of a worldwide manhunt. Last seen in the Bahamas, he was never caught. His legend inspired Drury Lane play The Successful Pyrate and Daniel Defoe’s 1720 account The King of Pirates. Hugh Bonneville’s pirate captain in a 2011 Doctor Who episode was named Henry Avery in tribute.

 

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